No, sir. I don’t want to smoke pot with you. Would you like some caviar?

Networking is a skill that we all have learned to improve working in such a high end area.  You never know the contacts you can make.  Many times you don’t even know who you are talking too.  I will have full on conversations with guests, only to have my supervisor tell me that person I was talking to was the prince of Africa, or a has been celebrity.  These people are to be regarded at a different level then the rest of us normal folks..these people are ‘somebody.’

This attitude of people falling into class systems does not sit that well with me.  Yes, someone may have more money then me, or be more well known.  But in the wise words of my friends lunatic father:

Everyone poops the same way.

So true, so wise, so gross but so right.

Therefore…it takes a lot for me to be impressed or intimidated by you.


My actor husband was doing his polite conversation thing thang at work.  A man asked him what he did, and my husband explained he was an actor.

Oh!  The man said.  I have  a house in New York City!  I know a lot of people in the business, yadda yadda, I am really rich, you want to know me.

My husband was like great!  The man gave him his business card.

It was such a nice, professional card.  It had his little nice name on it, and the locations of his two lovely homes.

Manhattan, and Palm Beach.


The man was a big shot and my husband was happy to take his card.

He came up and told me how nice the man was, and showed me his card.

Hmm…interesting.  A friendly Palm Beacher…how odd. 

Anyways, the night goes on and the men continue chatting.

The Palm Beach man says to my husband

Hey!  Do you work tomorrow night?

No, my husband replied.

Oh!  Well I am having a party at my house on the island. You and your wife should come!

Sahweet.  Invited to a Palm Beach party, thrown by a old rich man.  I can only imagine the delicious snacks…

My husband said Oh!  Thanks!  He kept on serving or whatever B.S. thing our job entails.

He told me about the mans offer….

I thought- sketchy.  But intriguing.

My husband again was at his table and the man again brought up the party.

Oh, we may come…yadda yadda awkward conversation.

The man pulls my husband in close, throws him a wink and says in a hushed tone.

Do you smoke a J?  Come over and we can smoke some pottttt!

Of course.  Why did we not see this earlier.  A classy, Palm Beach business man wanted us, young, youthfulcollege kids to come over and be his drug buddy.  Clearly the first thing you think of when you see a respectable, pulled together Palm Beach man wearing yacht clothes you instantly think of STONER!

No.  It really does not come to mind.

My poor husband had to politely decline his request, in the overly polite, professional tone we use with guests.

No sir, I do not um….smoke J’s.  But…thanks for the offer?

The most awkward question a guest has ever asked us.  No thank you rich man, I don’t want to come to your undercover drug party and chill with Bernie Madoff.  Maybe when If I become a mulit-millionaire then I too, will partake is such shady ways. Or maybe I will become a philanthropist? Option 2 please.


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